Friendship...What does it really mean?

Today, I'm saying thanks to you, my friends who read my two recent posts, and who are cheering me on in my renewed efforts to keep my blog active. 

I have friends, you have friends, every one around us has friends.

Friendship is a part of life that is as old as mankind itself. And yet, its something that we don't quite understand.

Who are my friends? What makes them friends? How did they become my friends? Do they consider me their friends? What are my expectations of them? Are they aware of those expectations?  Do they have the same expectations of me, or different ones? Am I aware of my expectations of them?

These and many more questions often run through my mind when I think of the subject friendship in general, and my own friends in particular.

As I share thoughts with others, I hear these words, "I thought she was my friend. How could she have done this?" 

I want to make my friendships real. I want them to last a lifetime. I want them to be impactful for those I call my friends and for me too.

I went out to the book-store this week to buy a gift for a friend. As I browsed the shelves in the store, voila! a title caught my attention. "How to Be A Best Friend Forever" by Dr. John Townsend. Trust me, I picked it up, looked at the back and read these words,

"Friend. It's a word whose meaning is confusing, and whose usage is overdone in our fast-paced world. Increasingly, our circles of "friends" are a mile-wide, yet the relationships are paper-thin. Even so, there's nothing like the sustaining strength and life enriching power of true-blue, forever friends. And we need them now more than ever".

I knew immediately that book was going home with me. I got the gift for my friend, completed my shopping and left the bookstore.

As I write this post, I have Dr. Townsend's book with me. It's my book to read in the coming weeks. I intend to read it and practice the things I learn from it. 

I will let you know what my experience is as I get on with reading the book.

Now, the floor is yours. For you, friendship...what does it mean?

Reading Books...Creating Memories

Some years back, I had just graduated from the University. The next thing on the agenda was to have a young man ask for my hand in marriage.

Leventis Store on Marina was still in its hey days. They had some great books in their book section. I bought quite a few titles from there. I cannot for the life of me remember these titles. One or two of them were about marriage.....

I read the books as though my life depended on it. As I look back now, I wasn't deliberately reading to prepare for married life. I just enjoyed reading books. I recall this story from one of the books.

"Tunde and Tolu (I don't remember the names now) were newly married. As they finished eating dinner one evening, they had some left over meat. Tolu remarked that her mum would have cooked some beans with the left over meat. Tunde, with a smile, said, "That's what my mum would do too!" They agreed that, the following evening, they'll have for their dinner, beans made with the left over meat.

The next day, all day at work, Tunde imagined his wife cooking beans just like his mum would do. Tolu, on the other hand cleaned the house and in the evening, lovingly prepared beans, just the way her mum would have done, She set the table, with a song on her lips, delighted that she had a pleasant evening with her husband to look forward to.

She heard Tunde arrive and went to the door to welcome him. Tunde, on arrival, was a bit perplexed as he walked in to their apartment. He couldn't perceive the aroma he had looked forward to all day long. He saw the table set and asked Tolu, "Didn't you say we'll have beans for dinner tonight?" "Of course, yes" she replied, opening the dish with flourish.  Becoming irritable, Tunde looked into the dish and snapped, "This isn't beans!" Close to tears, Tolu replied, "What do you mean? This is beans!"

They exchanged a few more sentences and then paused and sat down, not wanting to quarrel. As they asked each other questions and listened carefully to one another, they learnt that though they had used the same words, they meant entirely different things. What Tunde's family referred to as beans was completely different from what Tolu's family referred to as beans."

I tucked this story away in some corner of my mind.

Fast forward some years later, I got married to my fantastic husband. Ever so frequently I found myself recalling Tunde and Tolu's story from that corner of my mind. It saved us some massive misunderstanding when we used words which we thought we both understood, only to the discover that the words meant different things to my husband and I!

That's the power that books have in building lives. I don't remember the title of the book or the name of the author. Yet, the lesson I learnt from it is still so fresh in my mind as though, I read the book just yesterday.

Many times ,when you're reading a book, you don't deliberately set out to learn something. However, some of what you read, stays with you, tucked away in some corner of your mind. Ready to be recalled and put to use when the need arises.

So will you pick up a book today, and start reading, just for the fun of it?

It's Now More Than Two Years.....

A little over two years now, I started this blog and posted two entries.

I was full of enthusiasm. I love books. They have impacted my life positively. I was going to share my experience as I read books and saw their impact on my life.

What happened since then? Did I stop reading books? No, I didn't. I have read many books since 2012. Did they impact my life significantly? Yes they did. Did I blog about my experience? No I didn't.

Why didn't I blog as I had planned? Since the beginning of this year, I have given quite some thought to this  question. The more I thought about it, the more I realised that a desire remains a desire, if I do not have a plan for bringing that desire to pass.

In 2012, I created a blog. I desired to share my experience about how books build my life, thereby encouraging others to read books. I was excited.....but I made no plans as to how my desire will become a reality. As the days passed, my desire remained a desire. I promised myself, I write something tomorrow. Tomorrow came and I didn't write a word. My blog remained empty for over two years, twenty four months, seven hundred and thirty days...Not a word did I write.

Today, I awoke from my sleep. I really want my desire to become reality. I am taking the first step in writing this post. I commit to writing a post a week for a start.

A week from today, I will have another entry. I'll see you then....